Give a day of the week any name other than Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, etc. and you’re giving that day all kinds of power and potential. A Monday already has the ability to make people groan out of grief that their weekend is already over. Friday was probably highly regarded on the previous Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, and the Saturday that follows is equally anticipated. You get the picture.
But give a day a title that separates it from those other days and you give that day the power to disappoint or satisfy depending on how the events of that day are handled. St. Patrick’s Day means a night of drinking and celebrating being Irish even though that day has absolutely nothing to do with the United States. Cinco de Mayo is wrongly viewed as Mexican Independence Day when it really has nothing to do with that, but that doesn’t stop Americans from celebrating it anyway with tequila and margaritas galore. If those nights aren’t spent drinking then generally they are considered failures and you have to wait a whole year to celebrate them again, when really all it takes is going out the following weekend and living it up then. Valentine’s Day is one of those days that holds more power to make or break a relationship than almost any other day of the year, and today didn’t fail to deliver.
I have spent the entire day today with a girl friend of mine who is afraid that she’s begun the process of destroying her relationship with her boyfriend. She’s somewhat controlling, tends to get her way buy pouting and giving the silent treatment, and he’s kinda tired of it. Who can blame him? At the end of the day she’s a loving girl, but what guy is going to want to deal with that kind of crap from someone who is supposed to be in love? Her boyfriend is 6 years younger than her clocking in at a very young 22 years of age, and he’s in the Navy. Throw in to that mix that they’re planning on getting married, she has a 7 year old kid who has yet to e introduced in to their relationship (long story), and he is currently in Virginia and North Carolina for the next couple of weeks and you have an epic failure just waiting to happen. Despite all of the negative things that this couple has to face there is one thing that could have saved this from being an utterly miserable day for my friend: a phone call.
Yes, a simple phone call from the boyfriend could have saved a lot of misery on the West Coast for my friend, but for whatever reason the boyfriend figured that a teddy bear delivered on Valentine’s Day was more than enough to show his affection. OK, that’s not totally fair for me to say because I didn’t talk to the guy. But I was with her when she spoke to him on the phone earlier in the day when she asked to talk to him later because she had something really important to say to him, something that would help their relationship out. Flash forward more than 9 hours and he still hasn’t called, texted, etc, on the one day of the year that women look at as the time that a man can really show them how much they are loved. So when playing pool at a bar with your guy friends takes precedence over talking to or even texting your girl on this one symbolically important day then that sends a pretty powerful and sad message.
I hate Valentine’s Day. Not because I haven’t had a Valentine in a very long time, but because of those high expectations that are placed upon men by the women that we know. It’s rare for a man to be successful at romance when we don’t really know how to read women in the first place. This is probably the best day to make the worst impression on the ladies in our lives and set the “potential” bar at a height at which we might actually be able to achieve, but because of procrastination and lack of planning we tend to fail even at that.